UNIVERSITY STUDENTS\' PERCEPTIONS TOWARDS FAMILY ARRANGED MARRIAGE AND STUDENTS\' PREFERENCE BETWEEN ARRANGED MARRIAGE AND LOVE MARRIAGE PDF

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Love or arranged marriage, is still a debatable regarding the best way to choose the partner for marriage. It is widely talked about on which is better on the basis of social nomenclature, understanding and in the long run of living a happy married life. Some said that the concept of arranged marria...

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EDF 2203 SOCIOLOGY OF EDUCATION SEM 1 19/20, SECTION 01 CASE STUDY: UNIVERSITY STUDENTS' PERCEPTIONS TOWARDS FAMILY ARRANGED MARRIAGE AND STUDENTS' PREFERENCE BETWEEN ARRANGED MARRIAGE AND LOVE MARRIAGE INSTRUCTOR: DR. ISMAIL HUSSEIN AMZAT

PREPARED BY: AMIR REDHO BIN OSMAN MUHAMAD IRFAN BIN NAHRAWI MUHAMMAD HAZIQ BIN ABD RAHMAN AMIN AIMAN BIN ARIFFIN MUHAMMAD ALIF HILMI BIN HUSSAIN

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University Students' Perceptions Towards Family Arranged Marriage and Students' Preference Between Arranged Marriage and Love Marriage

Amir Redho, Irfan Nahrawi, Haziq Rahman, Alif Hilmi, Amin Ariffin Kulliyyah of Education International Islamic University Malaysia (IIUM) Abstract Love or arranged marriage, is still a debatable regarding the best way to choose the partner for marriage. It is widely talked about on which is better on the basis of social nomenclature, understanding and in the long run of living a happy married life. Some said that the concept of arranged marriage is better than arranged marriage due to the reason for they know what you want, and they will choose the best for you. To understand this ideology the researcher made the qualitative methodology to comprehend the objective of this study which is to understand what is the university student's preference among love marriage and arranged marriage and understand the significant benefits of love marriage as well as arranged marriage, with the aim of identifying the factors that cause their preference. In additional, this study also determined the challenges faced by both arranged marriage and love marriage. A standardized interview was conducted with six participants from four different year of study in International Islamic University Malaysia (IIUM). The study revealed that majority of the respondents had the same preference towards love marriage rather than arranged marriage because of no force in love, knowing well, good ways of acceptance between each other. Dimensions of the study that revealed the good relationship between a partner can build the true love, long lasting relationship, good communication, harmonious and happy family, understandable partner and knowing the best thing of their partner. Most of the respondent further stated that communication, financial problems, respect issue, misunderstanding, and way of behavior can be the challenges that need to be face and also to find the best solutions in a good manner.

Keywords: student's preference, love marriage, arranged marriage, marital type

Introduction The most critical of all interpersonal relationships is marriage, as most people marry at least once in their lives (Berscheid & Regan, 2005). Marriage is also a social institution that affects the lives of people as well as being a close personal relationship. It is the basis for formation a family to produce and raise children (Ponzetti & Mutch, 2006), as it legally permits sexual intercourse and encourages husband-wife fidelity (Rao, 2002; Stutzer & Frey, 2006). Marital value is an important area of human life that is desirable and valuable. Marital quality is an integral, attractive and valuable area of human life. This allows the natural growth of society in the formation of family units. In addition to having an impact on society, better quality marriages have a significant impact on the happiness, well-being and productivity of life of individuals (Madathil & Benshoff, 2008). Better marital performance is associated with lower depression (Williams, 2003), better self-rated wellbeing, and less physical illnesses (Umberson, Williams, Powers, Liu, & Needham, 2006). It is therefore not shocking that troubled marriage leads to increased vulnerability in an individual's recovery times to disease, illness and delays (Coon & Mitterer, 2011). Marriage starts with the choice of a marriage partner that is one of an individual's most serious decisions (Fisman, Iyengar, Kamenica, & Simonson, 2006). The way a marriage partner, method, rules and conditions are chosen differs mostly from culture to culture and from society to society. Often individuals choose their partner with their own selection and sometimes they are chosen by other individuals including family etc. Hamon and Ingoldsby (2003) identified three mate selection approaches; marriage by capture, arranged marriage, and selection of free-choice mate. Marriage by capture is not a usual and accepted method as in its men marry the women by force and without women’s will. Marriage is more a social affair than an individual affair, considered not just two individuals as the union of two families (Sonpar, 2005). Young people are encouraged to marry for the purpose of acquiring adult status, gaining some measure of independence from their parents, producing family heirs, raising children, and continuing the family name (Stange, Oyster, & Saloan, 2011). A marriage's permanence and stability are important not only for the couple, but also for their family and society as a whole (Sonpar, 2005). Batabyal and Beladi (2011) distinguished love and arranged marriages in the following manner, "In love marriages," men and women who want to get married finding a bride / groom and this activity is usually carried out by the two people who are interested in getting married.

In contrast, the individuals who want to get married typically do not perform any search activities on their own in "arranged marriages." Alternatively, the task of finding a suitable bride or groom is carried out by relatives, the family and, in recent times, by matchmaking firms increasingly. The basis for love marriage is mutual attraction and affection, whereas the basis for arranged marriage is the selection of the most suitable match from the available options. Each marriage type has its advantages and disadvantages. In addition, the various approaches adopted to decide on mate selection have a major impact on marriage success. In terms of marital satisfaction, marriage success can be measured as marriage is considered to be a source of pleasure enjoyment and fulfillment (Hess, 2008; Knox & Schacht, 2012). In a study conducted in Nepal, Allendorf and Ghimire (2013) found that satisfaction with marriage was higher when the spouse was selected by both the individual and the family or by the person alone than when the spouse was selected by the family alone. Xiaohe and Whyte (1990) observed, however, that Chinese women who were married by their own choice were more satisfied with their marriages than women whose marriages were arranged by their families. Saroja and Surendra (1991) studied Indian postgraduate students ' endogamous preference for mate selection. The results revealed that 58 percent of students preferred arranged marriages, while 42 percent preferred marriage for love. However, Hollist and Miller (2005) argued that marriage of love has stronger marital relationships. Love marriage also predicts successful conflict resolution, freedom of marriages, engagement, trust, and positive marriage emotions. Research Objectives 1. To understand the preferences of marriage among university students; arranged marriage or love marriage 2. To identify and to know the benefit of both arranged marriage and love marriage 3. To determine the challenges faced by both arranged marriage and love marriage

Research Questions RQ 1: What do you prefer between arranged marriage and love marriage? RQ 2: What is the benefit you will gain when you chose either arranged marriage or love marriage? RQ 3: What are the challenges that you will face according to your preference between arranged marriage and love marriage?

Definition of Love Marriage and Arranged Marriage An arranged marriage involves two individuals who are strangers to each other but choose to be married by their families. Sometimes both individuals have the opportunity to meet each other before they consider each other as a potential partner. It involves family members such as parents, siblings or elders and professional matchmakers with the consent and permission of the young people of the partner select suitable potential partners for mostly done. The groom's vocation rather than passion in arranged marriages is an important factor. In arranged marriages, the emphasis is on caste, gender, faith, family reputation, horoscope, age and language, etc. (Stange, Oyster, & Saloan, 2011). Choice marriage is commonly referred to as marriage of love. Love marriages are those where two people feel love for each other and want to share that love for the rest of their lives, so they agree to marry (Dost, Shafi, Shaheen, & Khan, 2011). Young men and women are likely to date, court, fall in love, and then decide whether to marry, with or without parental consent, in accordance with their choice of a potential partner. Love marriages are considered full of love, feelings, and confidence in a lovely future, but there is no guarantee of success (Dost, Shafi, Shaheen, & Khan, 2011).

Literature Review Marital Adjustment among Love Marriage and Arranged Marriage Couples The purpose of this study is to determine the level of marital adjustment between love marriage and arranged marriages based on the article that we found. This research, which focuses on 200 individuals, is equally divided between male and female. Marital adjustment refers to the situation in which there is a general sense of happiness and satisfaction between the husband and wife with their relationship and with each other. The key to healthy marriage does not mean that there is no dispute, but it does mean ways to resolve conflicts. Marital adjustment is an understanding between the couple to the extent that there is a relationship between the two arrangements on the need for affection and intimacy, as well as the accommodation that the couple gives to each other (Lock and William, 1959).

In the field of marital adjustment, a large number of research and studies have been carried out to highlight various aspects, some of which are listed here. Garima et al. (2014) found that working and non-working women differed not on marital adjustment and psychological well-being, but on few psychological well-being dimensions. Rinku (2013) revealed that in comparison with working women, non-working women face more marital adjustment problems. German (2008) found that women had significantly higher trust and marital satisfaction than men. Eng et al. (2005) examined the effect of marital status change on men's health behaviors. They observed marital dissolution adversely affecting men's health and dietary behavior. Ng et al. (2009) investigated marital and life satisfaction gender differences and the results show that women generally report lower marital quality than men. Kerkmann et al. (2000) found that finance and marital change had a positive relationship. The objective of this study is to determine the level of marital adjustment between male and female subjects. In addition, the researcher also reported that they had to figure out the level of marital adjustment between love marriage and arranged nuclear family marriage subjects and the level of marital adjustment between love marriage and arranged marriage. For the hypothesis we found in this report, the study showed that there is no substantial difference in terms of arranged marriage between mean scores of male and female and loved marriages based on the question that the researcher distributed to them. To put in conclusion, based on this study, it may be inferred that the mean scores of marital changes between love marriage and arranged marriage subjects do not differ significantly. To sum up, it is possible to conclude the findings as follows; 1. No significant difference between male and female subjects mean scores. 2. No significant difference between male and female subjects of love marriage. 3. No significant difference between male and female subjects in the mean scores of arranged marriage. 4. No significant difference between mean marriage love scores and arranged nuclear family marriage topics.

Research Theoretical Framework: Arranged Marriage: From the thesis that we found from the authentic resources, we may describe arranged marriage as a marriage organized and accepted by the families or guardians of the couple concerned. In contrast, traditionally arranged marriage takes place in Africa, South East Asia, Middle East and Latin America. In Western countries (SURGIR), migratory patterns have taken the norm. In reaction, European countries are attempting to prevent this situation by legislative measures, tightening immigration laws, and imposing family reunification conditions (Briones Martínez, 2009). According to ACNUR / UNCHR, forced and arranged marriages can lead to women entering a cycle of poverty and lack of protection as most are exposed to violence, abuse and forced sexual relations (ACNUR / UNHCR). In addition, some research indicated that in order to prevent forced and arranged marriages, the legal and policy framework needs to go hand in hand with education to increase women's economic opportunities (Sabbe et al. 2013).

Robert Sternberg’s theory: The theory of psychologist Robert Sternberg defines love styles based on three different scales: affection, passion, and engagement. Recognizing that a single-element relationship is less likely to survive than one based on two or more (Sternburg, 1986) is significant. When different combinations of these three components, different stages and forms of love can be described. For example, with the creation of an adult romantic relationship, the relative importance of each variable changes over time (Sternburg, 1986). He also categorized love into several parts which is (1) infatuated love is often felt as "love at first sight." But without the components of love's intimacy and dedication, infatuated love that suddenly disappear. (2) Empty love: often stronger love deteriorates into empty love, where engagement persists, but affection and passion have passed away. Relationships often begin as empty love in cultures where arranged marriages are common. (3) Romantic love, romantic lovers are bound emotionally (as in pleasure) and physically by passionate excitement. (5) Companionate love is often found in marriages where the passion is gone out of the relationship, but there is still deep affection and commitment. Companion love is usually a personal relationship with someone with whom you share your life, but without any sexual or physical attraction (Sternburg, 1986).

Consequences of the Love Marriage: Love and marriage's connection are not without its problems. Romantic love was considered a dangerous idea from the very beginning. Its connection with freedom and freedom, its disconnection from family, class, social and religious duty, makes it an obvious criticism target. That association with free love and sexual freedom, no matter how misconceived, made it a threat to traditional family structures and monogamous marriage for a lifetime. There's some weight to this level. It has been shown that the correlation between love and marriage makes the institution of marriage less secure and fickler (R. Goodwin, 1999). Nevertheless, feminism is the most persistent critique of romantic love (not just marriage). While Solomon and Giddens both claimed that the link between love and freedom and equality could be transformative and empowering for women (R.C. Solomon, 1998), some feminists fiercely questioned this statement. Shulamith Firestone described romantic love as the symbol of women's oppression, portraying love as holocaust, hell, and sacrifice (S. Firestone, 1970). Lovers in their wealth, talents, and responsibilities that they bring to their love can be very different from each other. Such disparities in a romantic relationship can establish imbalances in power, authority, and status. If two lovers become one, it may well be more than the other that they become. Or, so to speak, the merger may take place within a single lover (Friedman, 2003).

Research Conceptual Framework In this study, Fig. 1 explains the research conceptual framework. This framework was created based on the research theoretical framework, which is guided by the arranged marriages journal, Robert Sternburg’s Theory and journal of consequences of love marriage. This figure describes about the arrange marriage, the love theories that Robert Sternburg highlighted and the consequences that can be happen during the marriage. Social. With this description, it is conceptualized for the preferences between love and arranged marriage among students to project or lead to factors that cause the preferences among the individuals and the kind of responses that they use in coping with marital issues.

THE MARRIAGE

TYPES OF MARRIAGE

LOVE MARRIAGE

ARRANGED MARRIAGE

1. FACTORS 2. BENEFITS 3. CHALLENGES

Methodology The methodology used is qualitative, since the aim of the research is to identify the factors that cause the preferences of university students towards love marriage and arranged marriage. Data were collected using the phenomenology approach, through semi-structured interviews, using the face-to-face technique with 6 individuals from 4 different level of study in IIUM. The participants consisted of three from male students and three from female students. In respect of the age of participants, they ranged from 19 to 23 years old. The techniques for data collection were: Semi-structured interview: The preparation of the interview was made through a detailed study of the foundations favorable to the practice found during the review of the literature. Most of the questions provided for extended and open answers in order to achieve a better exchange of information. Prior to conducting the interviews, a simple note of introduction about the study was sent out and informed consent was obtained. All interviews were conducted in English and Malay, according to the preference of the interviewee. Interviews were recorded for transcription, translation and analysis. Interviews last 30 minutes in average.

Results and Findings In this study, themes and sub-themes answer the six questions of the study. The following are the results and descriptions of the direct quotes from the six participants.

Research questions 1: What do you prefer between arranged marriage and love marriage?

All participants chose and preferred love marriage compared to arranged marriage and they have same understanding about love and arranged marriage.

Table 1 Participants' Demographic Data ___________________________________________________________________________ No

Interviewee

Gender

Year of study

1

Participant 1

Female

4th year

2

Participant 2

Male

3rd year

3

Participant 3

Female

3rd year

4

Participant 4

Male

2nd year

5

Participant 5

Male

1st year

6

Participant 6

Female

4th year

___________________________________________________________________________

Same preferences All participants interviewed preferred more to love marriage compared to arranged marriage as they have the same opinion that says that love marriage better because of love comes from us without force and they have same understanding about love and arranged marriage. P1: “I prefer love marriage because we falling in love by own self not like arranged marriage, we will feel disappointed being matched by some party”. P2: “I prefer love marriage because there is no force from either side”.

P3: “I prefer love marriage because love marriage based on affection towards each other”. P4: “love marriage is better because we willingly want to married with particular person”. P5: “I prefer more love marriage rather than arranged marriage because love marriage, we can know our spouse’s ...