Week Two - Lecture notes 2 PDF

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Summary

Julie Cross...

Description

Vertical Stressors

The issues, powerful beliefs and values that we collect in our Family of Origin, pack up and take with us to our Family of Procreation We collect them in our family of origin Family where childhood took place Not the experiences but what you end up believing as a result of those experiences taken place Gender roles and lines Transpire to your own children Or you might go the opposite way We all have our vertical stressors and we take them where we go They are not the experiences themselves, but the result of being part of the experience in our “relationship school” Our Vertical Stressors are then reflected in the ongoing pattern of our behaviour and in our responses to situations and relationships They show up in every response we have

Our VS’s are “in the driver’s seat” to steer our interactions and responses They have a lot of control whether we like it or not Operating with vertical stressors we don’t know are there

Often, others can recognize them more easily than we can! Important to pay attention to the consistent things that are coming back Examples? consider media characters you know enough to describe their behavioural responses in their relationships

Other examples? consider media characters you know enough to describe their behavioural responses in their relationships

Greys Anatomy example

Vertical Stressors can either:

Vertical Stressors can either: Help us! OR Hurt

How might I help others get a picture of how their early experiences have shaped them and given them their stressors Understand how it works before you try to make change where it is not get ready to change

Vertical Stressors : HARD WORK = SUCCESS ALL PROBLEMS HAVE SOLUTIONS THE WORLD IS A SAFE PLACE FAMILY IS THERE WHEN YOU NEED THEM MARRIAGE IS FOREVER GOD IS LOVE LOVE CONQUERS ALL WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, MAKE LEMONADE Bumper Stickers WHEN THE GOING GETS

TOUGH, THE TOUGH GET A DRINK SUCCESS IS FOR THE LUCKY IF SOMETHING CAN GO WRONG, IT WILL VIOLENCE IS AN ACCEPTABLE SOLUTION TO A PROBLEM POWER-CONTROL FEAR CONTROLS BETTER THAN RESPECT

They show up like bumper stickers, in a situation they pop up, here's my belief

Can be full on stories about the world and who people are and who we are in the world

Determine how we address life’s challenges and who we call on for support Who we call on for support A support worker - CAS. This reaction / vertical stressor come from experience of the person you're trying to support We tend to create lives to fit our vertical stressors

“We become the stories we tell about ourselves” - Michael White

Narrative Therapy: people’s lives are organized by their life narratives.

Workbook

What are some examples of your parents’ vertical stressors? How have those VS’s influenced their behaviour? (reactions, decisions, expectations, etc)

Think, Pair, Share Consider this statistic: “4 out of 6 teen mothers at Bethesda House had mothers who were pregnant as teens” (Blidner, 2000) Explain this using what you now know about Vertical Stressors.

Two ways Vertical Stressors are created: slowly over time, collective impact of many, many interactions…. OR after one significant event Something happens and now you have this new belief BAM!! Horizontal Stressors

These are the “BAM” events that happen in our lives Significant experiences or life events that are brought around through time or change As you move through life things happen Old vertical stressors are challenged or solidified

Two Types:

Predictable Moving out Getting married Having a planned baby First child going off to college

Unpredictable (don’t always have to be negative) Serious illness Losing a job Getting pregnant Winning the lottery

Alexandre & Frederic Bilodeau

Article Activity

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/347007-frederick-bilodeau-motivation-behind-the-gold

Olympic Gold Medalist

Collision Course

Collision Course vertical and horizontal stressors interact with each other to influence an individual's belief system

Relationship of Vertical Stressors to Horizontal Stressors Horizontal stressors can create vertical stressors in our family of origin.

Horizontal stressors unpack our vertical stressors in our family of procreation.

Vertical stressors influence whether or not an event is interpreted as significant. Influence if you even perceive an event as significant Do you know someone with a powerful vertical stressor that often gets triggered by a minor situation? Describe someone whose vertical stressors influences inappropriate responses. Describe a situation that has triggered someone else’s vertical stressor but not one in you.

Coping in Families

What does it mean to cope?

Family is always under some sort of stress STRESS = degree of pressure exerted on the family to alter the strategies it employs to accomplish basic tasks Patterns will respond to stress, perpetuate, minimize when stressful things arise When something happens a family responds Strategies

Consider adolescence…

Oldest child becomes an adolescent:

Needs to meet own developmental tasks Laundry

School Job

Exerts stress on family

Adjustments to patterns must occur

bedtimes, routines, rules, etc

Stress

Provides information / feedback to reveal how the family is functioning what might be some examples of this information/feedback? Realize they can do it Maybe readjust

Two Types of Stressors:

Normative Expected Developmental transitions

Non-normative Unexpected

Unanticipated

…..other terms for these?

More about Vertical Stressors: attitudes expectations taboos secrets unresolved emotional issues Mental illness

Coping in Families overall level of stress is determined by both horizontal & vertical stressors any family, with enough horizontal stressors, will appear dysfunctional for awhile Not meant that they are the families that are screwed up Not judgement Systems lens and that their system is not functioning properly Any family with enough stress is going to need some support * neighbours with kids

Vertical Stressors Family Patterns, Myths, Secrets, Legacies System Levels 1. Social, Cultural, Political, Economic (Gender, Religion, Ethnicity, etc.) 2. Community, Work. Friends 3. Extended Family

4. Nuclear Family 5. Individual Time Horizontal Stressors 1. DEVELOPMENTAL Life Cycle Transitions 2. UNPREDICTABLE Untimely Death, Chronic Illness. Accident FIGURE 2.1 Horizontal and Vertical Stressors Source: From Betty Carter and Monica McGoIdrick (Eds.), The Changing Family Life Cycle: A Framework for Family Therapy, 2e. Published by Allyn and Bacon, Boston, MA. Copyright 01989 by Pearson Education. Reprinted by permission of the publisher....