For one more day - Grade: A PDF

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“For One More Day” by Mitch Albom

1. Who are the characters in the story? What is the story about?

The characters in the story For One More Day are Charles “Chick” Benetto a former baseball player, the protagonist of the story; Pauline “Posey” Benetto, a loving mother to Chick and Roberta and is also the reason to Chick’s academic success; Len Benetto, Chick’s Father who influences his sons’s career in baseball and a former Soldier of World War II; Catherine, Chick’s wife; Maria, Chick and Catherine’s daughter and also the narrator of the story; Roberta, Chick’s younger sister. The story is about a mother and a son, and a relationship that covers a lifetime and beyond. It tells about the story of Charles "Chick" Benetto, a former baseball player who encounters a myriad of problems with his career, finances, family and alcohol abuse. This leads him to become suicidal. Charles goes on a drunken rampage and decides he is going to end his life in his old home town, but when he misses the exit, he turns around driving down the wrong side of the highway causing an accident, Benetto flees to his old home and attempted a suicide attempt, an apparent failure to see his mother, who had died eight years prior. Benetto returns to his old family home, and spends one more day with his mother, where in a number of previously unknown factors related to his difficult childhood and troubled relationship with his father are revealed to him. His mother assists him in resolving his issues and getting his life back on track. The day ends when Benetto regains consciousness at the scene of the accident in a police officer's arms and after recovering from his car crash, het gets back in touch with his daughter and wife and becomes a great

contributor to society. It ended by the revelation that it is Maria who have been narrating the story. 2. Who among the characters for you like the most and why? Or the least and why?

The character who grown on me in the story is Pauline “Pose” Benetto, Chick’s mother. I saw her as an perfect image of a mother to her children and as a wife to his husband. She portrayed the role of being courageous, passionate, loving and brave to her family. You could see that despite of being hurt with her husband’s secret, whom she found out has another family, she did not turn a blind eye and did not let her children suffer with her for the consequences that their father did, but instead she was brave enough to overcome it. She made sure that she is able to provide the needs of her family. Despite all of her hardships in life she kept her courage. Her children has always been her main priority, she is willing to stand up for them whenever they need her help. The story also shows that she wanted to impart her morals with her children making sure that she taught them the right things to do. As for the least character it was Len Benetto, Chick’s father. He was a selfish man who insist on things that he knows he could benefit from. He insisted his own dream for his son with expectations, when after all it was not even Chick’s interest to do so. He is also an irresponsible husband to his wife whom he leaves for another woman. He failed to reciprocate the love and efforts that his wife was giving him because he only chooses himself. 3. Give the story a different ending, one that you think is better. Why do you choose this ending?

I think the ending was just a perfect fit on how to the story should end. But if I were to change the ending, I would of have help Chick in his despair moments I want him to have the help that he needs and guidance that he lacks of. Before his mother passes away and before he lost his family, his job, before basically being left with nothing to lean on anymore and before losing the most important things in life. I wanted to give him the chance to go back and change his past. For him to have the time to learn how important it is hold on and appreciate your riches in life which is your family. But instead of drinking most of the time, not sleeping and eating at all and wasting off his life with nonsense things, I want him to live every moment of his life at best so that he would not be left regrets in the end. Suicide will not be and will never be a solution to something. Most people believe that it is the only thing that they could do to end their suffering but instead what happen is you were just passing it to others, it could be your family or those people around you. I know seeking help is easier said than done, I have been there. But you have to fight it and master up enough courage that you are capable of overcoming it. And as to my take away in the story “No man is an island”, someone would always be right beside you, willing to listen and help you. Remember that there are so much more that the world can offer us than just taking out our own life.

4. Are there any significant words or phrases or mottos or quotes in the story that struck you the most? If yes, what is it and why?

It was Chick’s final thoughts where he says “ I feel ashamed now that I tried to take my life. It is such a precious thing. I had no one to talk me out of my despair, and that was a mistake. You need to keep people close. You need to give them access to your heart.” I could say at some point in my life I was Chick in this story. I tend to push people away and it did not just do anything good for me. I kept on telling myself that I don’t need anyone and will try to make the situation worse by trying to suppress my feelings about it. I am extremely uncomfortable with other people seeing me being vulnerable or in pain and I do most things alone. And I realized this the hard way that when you push everything away, it will only push you into a bad state, You will fall into slump, lose your balance and slowly lose your grip from everything to fall to rock bottom. So if everytime that you feel sad, depressed and weak, reminisce and think back of the time that you push people away, when you feel helpless because you do not let them access to your heart. I would say, keep you hearts open to anything because in our life hurt is inevitable, but if you stay strong and keep everything important close by your side, you will realize that no mountains of problem is impossible to break through.

1. are you doing what you truly want to do?

Not all dreams are not meant to come to fruition through you. Not everyone has the fortune to do everything what their hearts crave for. Sacrifices were to be made in order to fulfill what you need than what you truly wants. Practicality over passion. Some dreams came to a halt because they were foreshadowed by the reality that sometimes your dream were not enough to thrive in this world. If you’ll imagine it made it seems like pursuing your dreams is such bad thing to do when perhaps all we need is a shift in perspective. “When a person can’t find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure.” Before I tend to lost touch with what it is that I truly want in the first place. I am slowly turning into a robot that grinds through the same routine day in and day out and then numb myself with various entertainment to get by. I was so afraid to let go of things that feels good even when it is not right. Doing things that I don’t love yet has good benefits but it’s not right, like choosing engineering than my passion for performing arts. I tend to settle for mediocrity

because I don’t want to risk losing what’s good. When it comes to pursuing things that we truly want to do, we tend to be idealistic before ever getting started. I realized the hard way that when doing things, the fear is inevitable but being courageous means you will still do something about it each day anyway. “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear.” As we change our perspective in life we become deeply reconnected with our purpose, passion, and talent. We’ll be able master up the courage to be true to ourselves and do what we truly wants. We begin to fight for what matters to us even though we are scared to find ourselves outside of our comfort zones. I quit changing my self in order to fit the standards other people were setting for me. So to answer the question, yes, I do enjoy the things that I do. 2. Give 3 promises you made and failed to keep. What made you not to keep your word?

To always love me and put myself and my best interest first, To live a life that feels right to me, not the one that looks right to others and to listen what my heart and soul is telling me. Basically a vow to love myself. Promising things to myself are the hardest to follow through on. I know I’ll do whatever I can to keep a promise to someone else but for myself it is a different story. When you make a promise to yourself and you failed to do so, you do not have anyone to be held accountable for, none other than yourself. Fear has gotten into me that I let it play for the most parts of my life. I was not able to fulfill these things just because I care too much about what other people will say. I thought I was doing the right thing by giving in to whatever they need or want from me. I

was so used to playing the role of being the perfect child or friend without realizing that I have been losing myself by the process. I was blinded by the idea that if I play my role perfectly I will be loved and adored by everybody. As I was doing these things I was once again reminded by the promises I made myself before for the same reason that I am still doing. Fear, loss of self confidence and doubts flooded my mind that I was not able to fulfill these promises. I once experience the feeling of being neglected for acting out as myself, neglected because I tried to voice my opinion, neglected because I chose to pursue my passion than their ideal dream for me, being tired of feeling neglected I gave in to the standards of other people just to feel accepted. Due to these misfortunes I failed to love myself and fulfill my self promise.

3. Are you willing to break rules for something you want or for someone you care for? Why?

Yes, as long as you have a great purpose. But first you must evaluate if it is worth it enough and will you be able to justify it’s consequences. Before you try to break the rules for someone or something, find enough reason before jumping into your actions. For me, as long as my decision does not go against my values and beliefs, I’d be willing to break the rules. Rules were meant to limit us but it does not really mean that we cannot break it. As long as you know that you were fighting for a great cause and right purpose and you were not hurting or invalidating other people. I do not oppose to the idea. Afterall, relationships could not be weighed against rules. Ignoring some societal norms and going ahead with what your gut instinct and knowledge indicates is right, acceptable and preferable. Sometime, being a conformist holds you back from

success and what would make you happiest in life. Advocacy of breaking the law is not my intention. I value compassion over some social norms specially when I truly care for that people, if they needed my help I will be more than willing to offer my hand and help them. But boundaries should be made in helping others, if I find that I have to do things that invalidates my values such as performing or participating in an act of sin, then that calls for the perfect timing of calling off whatever cause that I was doing.

4. Is there anything you cannot let go of but you know you should?

Overthinking. Thoughts are very powerful. Your thoughts has the tendencies to become your reality. I tend to think things through whether it is my decisions in life, what my future holds, and unlikely events that is yet to happen. I have the habit of continuously replaying things in my head specially in decision making, as someone who is afraid to make wrong decisions, I will end up not taking any action at all. Overthinking sometimes leads to a sleepless nights which will then turn into stress and negative self talk. And stress after all is bad not just to our physical but also mental health. As an overthinker I tend to focus on the past expending the energy on “what ifs” and “should haves” making it hard for me to let of go of the past. We do not have the control and change our past but instead we have the ability to change it’s meaning. And doing these while being an overthinker does not help at all. Dwelling on my miserable past makes it hard for me to take a step forward in life. Overthinking became one of my addictions that it makes it hard for me to let go of.

Letting go these stress inducing thought patterns and lifestyle is rough and I have yet to find the right strategy in releasing grudges, negative perspectives and toxic relationships in my life. But I know that once I have lost grip in all of these negative things it will be worth the effort to have a greater peace of mind. 5. Do you remember someone you hated 5 years ago? Does it still matter now?

Hatred is a mighty strong emotion. It has the capacity to pollute your spirit, to poison your soul and affect your relationship with those around you. I do not recall having grudge against anyone. But for the past few year I have been in a constant battle with myself. Insecurity, unattractiveness, low self esteem or being self-critical, these negative internal feelings shape and give life to the destructive impulses of my self-hatred. Instead of inspiring, encouraging words I do the exact opposite and let myself down. Self doubts creeps into my system starting an inner war inside my head. As it drains everything that you have, eventually, you can not stand it any longer. Emotional burnout sets in, and you will be forced to confront it and came down to the decision of choosing, either to self destruct to escape the pain or to embrace self-acceptance. And if you chose the latter, acceptance could not be gained without looking at your past. It will serve as your motivation to see and be reprimanded of your miserable past that falling back to your old state is not worth it. To the question does these things still matter now? I must say yes, but instead for a greater purpose. Time passes and you get better in growing. You take stock of yourself and start to acknowledge that this is you and you should be grateful. In my case, 5 years is more than enough to look back and compare that the current state of my wellbeing is

much more lighter and brighter when you accept your past while moving on a next chapter. 6. Are you afraid of making mistakes even if there will be no punishments given? Why?

Truth be told, no one can live on this earth without mistakes at one time or the other. Mistakes are really essential in our learning processes. Make use of your mistakes as a springboard to climb higher and to use it as a testing kit to level your perseverance at the same time. The fear of failing affects your life into no good. Forget about your fears and conquer it with or without consequences. Do not fear the outcome of failure holds because the most important thing in failing is the moment that you get back on your feet again making sure that you learn from the situation, and not necessarily letting it weigh you down. It comes down to the question and if we learn from our mistakes even though there will be no punishment, then why do others find it hard to make mistakes still? Defense Mechanism. They we’re afraid, not with the punishment but what it’s outcome to their selves specially on how others perceived them. They were afraid that others might think of them as incompetent. There are unlikable things that we possess that we opt to stay hidden and not known by others because of the fact that we don’t want it to affect our own self-esteem, such as failing. Other reason could be because there are mistakes that you only have one chance, and if you blow it, you basically passed up that opportunity. In some cultures people’s attitude towards mistakes can be hostile. This could be because of the need to show others that “we can do it” or “we are worth it”. In other words it is a need to prove that

you are something. To answer the question, am I afraid? Yes. But you have to master up the courage to give it a try even with various possible outcome. 7. Whats the difference between you and most other people?

Every human being that has ever lived, or ever will live, is unique. So I must say I am one of a kind. People share the same usual habits, even physically but the similarity ends there. Then what makes me different from others? I do not share the same experiences that I had in life with others. Everyone experiences variations in their day. For instance, I spent my whole enhance community quarantine period inside our house together with my family, we do the same things most of the time. But we experience the period a little differently. Such as when I my sibling is cooking he burnt her hands while for me it did not happen. This is just to prove how I was different from others. A paradoxical mix of outgoing but introverted, very social but seldom out. And this is exactly how I describe myself. Socially speaking it takes a while for me to be fully comfortable with others, so I can only take being around others gradually. I was generally a cheerful person, I’m usually full of love and happiness. I grew up with my strong parents who taught me to to cultivate my independence. They were my role models in knowing how to speak my mind in social situations. How to stand up for myself during confrontations, and how to thrive on my own. Collectively, these were the things that made you different from others. But what really makes me unique is my willingness to embrace who I truly am and what I truly want and being passionate in everything that I do. Because most people are not comfortable embracing their differences because they

wanted to fit in. Moreover, most people sugar coats their personality in interacting with the world. 8. If you were to die now, would you have any regrets? “Everything happens for a reason, so there is no point in having regrets.” But for so many of us, looking back on our lives can lead us to linger on one poignant moment or period when we wish we had done things differently. I believe that no matter how old you get or how happy you are, there would be a countless regrets in your life. In my 18 years of existing in this world, I wish I cared less about what other people thinks because it was just now that I am starting to learn how to get out of my comfort zone and how to gain confidence in doing things that I was passionate about, while making a lot of experiences. I wish I had told how I truly felt and stood up for myself more. I live by making people everyone please with me at the expense of my own happiness, I also failed to share my gratitude and apologies towards the people that I care about just because I decided to stay quiet. I wish I had taken more risks and not worry about things so much. Without realizing that I was already caught up by my too much emotions, I wish I could have taken better care of myself and be happier only if I know how to let go of negativities in my life. I wish I had more time and lived more in the moment, you’ll only realize how short-lived and how precious time really is, and as we age, many of live less and less in the present including myself. 9. If you were to be born in another lifetime, what would you want to be?

If I were to be born in another lifetime I wanted to become a dog. The dogs symbolizes companion and guardian. Dogs are very positive, they are loyal, faithful,

honest, and willing to fight the injustice. They were far different from humans which is why they were so loveable and I care about them on a deeper level. I chose to become a dog because I want to serve as a loyal companion for others may it be in their good or bad times. My dogs gives me endless happiness that no one other things can give me and I wanted to share the same feeling with others. They only serve a one gr...