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WEEK 4: ENGAGING IN VERBAL COMMUNICATION 4.1 Language and Meaning  Symbols: Arbitrary, ambiguous and abstract representations of phenomena. Symbols are the basis of language, much nonverbal behaviour and human thought.  Nonverbal communication: All forms of communication other than words themselves, includes infection and other vocal qualities as well as several other behaviours such as shrugs, blushing and eye movements. 4.1.1 Feature of Language  Verbal communication: or language that consists of symbol in the form of spoken or written words.  Verbal symbols form the core of the human world of meaning. E.g. your name, credit hour, love. 

3 characteristics of symbols:-

I.

Arbitrariness  Arbitrary: random or not necessary. Symbols are arbitrary because there is no need for any particular symbol to stand for a particular referent.  E.g. the term twerk has no natural relationship to provocative dancing.  Meanings change over time.

II.

Ambiguity  Ambiguous: subject to multiple meanings. Symbols are ambiguous because their meanings vary from person to person, context to context, and so forth.  Means it doesn’t have clear-cut, precise meaning.

III.

Abstraction  Abstract: removed from concrete reality. Symbols are abstract because they refer to, but are not equivalent to reality.  Means that words are not the phenomena to which they refer.

4.1.2 Principles of Communication  These principles of communication explain how we create meaning for our interactions. I.

We interpret communication  Because language is abstract, ambiguous, and arbitrary, we have to interpret it to determine what it means.  John Searle (1976,1995) distinguishes between brute facts and institutional facts.  Brute facts are objective, concrete phenomena and activities.  Institutional facts are the meanings of brute facts based on human interpretation.

II.

Rule Guide Communication

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III.

Communication rules: shared misunderstandings among members of a particular culture or social group about what communication means and what behaviours are appropriate in various situations. Two kinds of rules guide our communication (Cronen, Pearce, & Snavely, 1979; Pearce, Cronen, & Conklin, 1979). Regulative rules: Communication rules the regulate interaction by specifying when, how, where and with whom to talk about certain things; what is considered appropriate or not in one society. Constitutive rules: what a particular communication means or stand for. E.g. showing respect (listen attentively, not correcting) and rudeness (talking over others).

Punctuation Affects Meaning  Punctuation: mental mark of the beginnings and endings of particular interactions (verbal/non-verbal)  Conflicting punctuation: Demand-Withdraw Pattern  A expresses closeness – B strives to maintain autonomy by avoiding interaction – A keep pushing for personal talk – B keeps withdrawing (each punctuates beginning of interaction with other’s behaviour)  Effective communicators: realise people don’t always punctuate the same way.

4.2 Symbolic Abilities 4.2.1 Language Defines Phenomena  We use words to define ourselves, others, experiences, relationships, feelings and thoughts (Monastersky, 2002).  In turn, the labels we use affect how we perceive what we have labelled. E.g. “a car” change into “my car” after you bought the car. The meaning attached changed with the possessive label.  The labels we use to define others affect how we perceive them.  Totalizing: responding to a person as if one label totally represents that person. E.g. totalizes gay men and lesbians by noticing only their sexual orientation. 4.2.2 Language Evaluates Phenomena  Loaded language: words that slant perceptions, and thus meanings, exceedingly. It encourages extreme perceptions. E.g. geezer or old fogey inclines us to regard older people with contempt or pity.  Reappropriation: A group’s reclamation of a term used by others to degrade the group’s members; the treatment of those terms as positive self-descriptions. Aims to remove the stigma from terms that others use pejoratively. E.g. LGBTQ people use the term of queer to label themselves. 4.2.3 Language Organizes Experiences  Words organize our perceptions of events and experiences.  The categories into which we place people influence how we interpret them and their communication.

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Enables us to monitor stereotypes and to stay alert to differences among things we place in any other category.

4.2.4 Language Allows Hypothetical Thought  Thinking about experiences and ideas that do not exist or are not immediately present to the senses.  We can contemplate things that have no real existence, and we can remember ourselves in the past and project ourselves into the future. 4.2.5 Language Allows Self-Reflection  We can think about who we want to be and set goals for becoming the self we desire .  We can self-reflect our actions and learn how to control them. 4.2.6 Language Defines Relationships and Interactions 

2 levels of meaning in communication: i. Content level: actual info/literal meaning ii. Relationship level: defines communicators’ identities & relationship between them

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3 dimensions of relationship-level meanings:

iii. Responsiveness: through questions and statements of agreement and disagreement or feedback; show interest. iv. Liking: Express liking verbally. v. Power: to define dominance and to negotiate status and influence.

4.4 Guidelines for Effective Verbal Communication 1. Engage in Dual Perspective a. Take another person’s POV into account as you communicate b. Don’t abandon own perspectives

2. Own Your Feelings and Thoughts a. Take responsibility for yourself: use language that owns your thoughts and feelings + don’t blame others for what happens in yourself b. Rely on I-language instead of You-language

You-language You hurt me.

I-language I feel hurt when you ignore me.

You make me feel small

I feel small when you tell me I’m selfish.

3. Respect What Others Say About Their Feelings and Ideas a. Don’t disparage what others say about what they feel/think b. Don’t tell people their feelings aren’t valid/appropriate/acceptable c. Don’t speak for them – let them speak for themselves

4. Strive for Accuracy and Clarity a. Be Aware of Levels of Abstraction – abstract words are appropriate when speakers and listeners have similar concrete knowledge about what is being discussed b. Qualify Language i. Qualify generalisations (e.g. “Politicians are crooked” < “A number of politicians accept bribes”) ii. Qualify descriptions and evaluations – 

Static evaluation: assessments that suggest something is unchanging/frozen in time

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Indexing: tie descriptions to a specific time and circumstance

WEEK 5: ENGAGING IN NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION 5.1 Principles of Nonverbal Communication  Nonverbal communication: All forms of communication other than words themselves; includes inflection and other vocal qualities as well as several other behaviours such as shrugs, blushing, and eye movements. 5.1.1 Nonverbal Communication is Ambiguous  We can never be sure the others understand the meanings we intend to express with our nonverbal behaviour. 5.1.2 Nonverbal Behaviours Interact with Verbal Communication  First: nonverbal behaviours may repeat verbal messages. E.g. say “yes” while nodding your head.  Second: nonverbal behaviours may highlight verbal communication, as when use inflection to emphasize certain words. E.g. “This is the most serious problem with the business plan”.  Third: Nonverbal communication may complement, or add to, words. E.g. capital or boldfaced letters are used to symbolize the same emphasis in online communication.  Fourth: Nonverbal behaviours may contradict verbal messages. E.g. a supervisor says, “Nothing is wrong” in a hostile tone of voice.  Fifth: substitute nonverbal behaviours for verbal ones. E.g. roll your eyes to show disapprove of something or shrug your shoulders instead of saying “I don’t know”.

5.1.3 Nonverbal Communication Regulates Interaction  NC can organize interaction between people (Guerrero & Floyd, 2006).  Cues tell us when someone else has finished speaking; to make someone else’s to speak or to avoid interruption. 5.1.4 Nonverbal Communication Establishes Relationship-Level Meanings  Responsiveness: (feedback) eye contact, facial expressions, body posture to indicate interest in others  Liking: e.g. smiles, friendly touching = positive feelings  Power: aka Control – assert dominance, express deference, negotiate status & influence 1. People with more power touch people with less power > People with less power touch people with more power 2. Men assume more space & use greater volume & more forceful gestures than women 3. People with more power have more space than people with less power 4. People with more power can enter the space of people with less power (vice versa = cannot) 5. Adults have more space than children 6. Men more often than women have their own rooms and sit at the head of the table 7. Men are more likely to move into others’ space 5.1.5 Nonverbal Communication Reflects Cultural Values  Non-verbal pattern reflect communication rules of specific cultures & social communities; not instinctual but learned in the process of socialisation 5.2 Types of Nonverbal Behaviours Kinesics Haptics Physical Appearance

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Artefacts

 Proxemics

Chronemics

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Paralanguage

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Environmenta l Factors

Body position, body motions, including face Our bodies express how we see ourselves Physical touch Communicates power & status We form initial evaluations based on appearance - judgements of how attractive & make inferences about personalities Personal objects with which we announce identities & personalise environments o Define settings & personal territories o Express personal identity o Express ethnic identity o Communicate about relationships Space + how we use it o Greater/lesser distance (comfortable vs uncomfortable) o Signals status (higher status, greater space) o Arrangement (formal vs casual / common space vs individual space) Elements of settings that affect how we feel & act E.g. architecture, colours, room design, temperature, sounds, smells, lighting Time + how we perceive and use it to define identities & interaction E.g. High status = can keep others waiting, Low status = must be punctual Express cultural attitudes toward time (e.g. Western: time is valuable, Other: more relaxed about time & punctuality) Reflects interpersonal priorities (e.g. we spend more time with people we like) Vocal communication that doesn’t involve words

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Sounds (murmurs, gasps), Vocal qualities (volume, rhythm, pitch, inflection) Communicate feelings (e.g. whispering = secrecy, shouting = anger) + how we see ourselves & wish to be seen by others Reflects cultural heritage Perform gender (e.g. masculinity = strong volume, low pitch / femininity = softer volume, higher pitch) Contentment (so comfortable you don’t need to talk) vs Awkwardness (pressured to fill the void) Disconfirm others (e.g. ignore to discipline)

5.3 Digital Media and Nonverbal Communication 

The use of emoticons or stickers to express feelings.

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The size of person’s electronic footprint. E.g. to indicate how much space people take by analysing their activities in social media.

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Digital communication can compete with and sometimes interfere with, face-to-face communication. E.g. check texts while talking with other f2f.

5.4 Guidelines for Effective Nonverbal Communication 5.4.1 Monitor Your Nonverbal Communication  To monitor your NV actions to more clearly communicate your involvement and interest in conversations. 5.4.2. Interpret Others’ Nonverbal Communication Tentatively.  Findings about the meanings people attach to non-verbal behaviours. 5.4.3 Personal Qualifications  Generalizations about NV behaviours state what is usual or common.  Use I-language to make the conversation sound less defensive so the interpretation of NV behaviours will avoid any inaccurate. 5.4.4 Contextual Qualifications  The significance of Nonverbal behaviours depends on the contexts in which they occur.

WEEK 6-7: ADAPTING COMMUNICATION TO CULTURES AND SOCIAL COMMUNITIES...