Couples Mission Statement PDF

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Running head: Couples Mission Statement

Couples Mission Statement Anissa Chambers Liberty University Dr. Deborah Pinkston October 11, 2019

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Couples Mission Statement

2 Couples Mission Statement Therapist’s Overview Proverbs 29:18 (MSG) If people can’t see what God is doing, they stumble all over themselves; But when they attend to what he reveals, they are most blessed.

Goal of the Exercise 1. To help couples define a general common purpose. 2. To help put together a reminder of the purpose. 3. To help premarital couples to establish roles for their marriage so they have realistic expectations.

Types of Problems This Exercise May Be Most Useful For 

Couples experiencing empty nest

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Couples who have been through infidelity/affairs

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Pre-Marriage

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Couples with lack of direction for their lives and marriage

Suggesting For Processing This Exercise With The Couple 1. What is a mission statement? 2. How might a mission statement help you with setting goals and/or making decisions? 3. How would you know if you are sidetracked from your mission? 4. How and/or where would you post this mission to remind you?

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5. What are some things as a couple you can do to stay the course and remain on mission together? When entering a marriage covenant every couple should talk about family, sex, realistic expectations, finances, faith, raising children, boundaries, responsibilities, jobs and purpose.

Expectations and Core Vison: As you plan this joining together what are some of the main expectations you want to see from your partner? When looking at those expectations are they reasonable and realistic? Do you each share the same vision and mission for your marriage? It is something you need to talk about together and often because life has a way of distorting those ideas (Worthington, 2005, p.61).

Boundaries in Marriage: Yes, there are boundaries in marriage, just that most people do not take the time to examine them. We all grow up thinking about roles and expectations from our partner, but rarely do we consider their expectations from us. It is important to understand what each others strengths and weaknesses are and to help each work with in those areas so we can continue to put our best foot forward. It does not mean that we can’t grow in our weaknesses but understand what they are. It is another area where we can seek first to understand before being understood.

Couples Mission Statement

4 Creating The Marriage Mission Exercise

Proverbs 29:18 (MSG) If people can’t see what God is doing, they stumble all over themselves; But when they attend to what he reveals, they are most blessed. Habakkuk 2:2-3 (MSG) And then God answered: “Write this. Write what you see. Write it out in big block letters so that it can be read on the run. This vision-message is a witness pointing to what’s coming. It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait! And it doesn’t lie. If it seems slow in coming, wait. It’s on its way. It will come right on time.

This exercise is to help you set-out on the right foot, regain your footing or maybe help you overcome some rough past. It is important that as you put this together it becomes something simple that you can memorize and you have posted some place so you can read it on the run of your life. How to do this exercise. Listed below are some things and activities people value. If there are some things that are not on the list feel free to add them below, make sure they are important to your mission and not a bunny trail. Using the numerical chart add the number to each question that best describes your ideal regarding the question. Please be as truthful as possible because it is in your truthfulness that you are creating expectations within your partner as well. Do not put false truths up just to please someone, be REAL.

1. 2. 3. 4.

It’s essential or fundamental. It’s anticipated and desired. You can take it or leave it. Absolutely not!

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Go through the following questions each of you individually and then discuss them together. _____ Daily Alone Time _____ Spending time with personal friends _____ Spending time with other couples _____ Personal hobbies _____ Disciplining Children _____ Helping with homework (children) _____ One on one time with the children _____ Attending Church _____ Family Dinners _____ Helping kids with extra activities _____ Cooking and eating at home _____ Being active in political/civic groups _____ Stay at home parent

_____ Date Night _____ Scheduled intimacy _____ Cleaning schedule _____ Children’s education _____ Saving for retirement _____ Buying/Owning our home _____ Personal health and fitness _____ Health insurance for the family _____ Sex (how often) _____ Family Vacations _____ Spending time with parents _____ Parents “get away” weekend _____ Family game nights

What conclusions do you believe from the choices made? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

From these conclusions what differences came up that you can now anticipate? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

Sit down with your partner and discuss what you have learned and together write a paragraph and describe the things that are most important to you as a couple. Do not worry about specific details but be general so that you can create a mission statement of purpose.

Example Mission Statement Our mission is to provide a loving, supportive and safe atmosphere in which we and our children can grow and explore what God has for us. We understand that it is going to take communication, compromise, sacrifice and balancing what is best for us with what is best for the

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family. Through Jesus we can choose to walk in love and forgiveness as we endeavor to do life together allowing the joy of the Lord to be our strength.

Purpose The purpose of this exercise is to open lines of communication so that when you are doing life together you can refer to what you talked about. Understand that life is crazy sometimes and so you will need to walk this out with hope, trust and sometimes sacrifice.

Summary “Couples Mission Statement” worksheet is a recreated worksheet called ”Creating a Mission” from the Couples Therapy Homework Planner.(Schultheis, O'hanlon, & O'hanlon,

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2010). The purpose is to help couples walk together in unity and/or rediscover who they are as they move forward. The original worksheet really had nothing to do with allowing God to help you in the process of coming up with your mission statement nor did it recognize His authority in the marriage. The worksheet fills in some of those gaps and has some added things that I felt was important in the discussion or what is important to the couples. The weakness is there are always things that are important to each couple and is impossible to list all. This is why we encourage them to add those ideas as they go. One of the best ways to waste time is to not know purpose or vision. You just hope along the way you get it right. God is a God of purpose and everything He does is on purpose. He created each of us with purpose as well. He calls us to make the most of our time her so that He can use us individual and as a couple. The Bible says, “Therefore see that you walk carefully [living life with honor, purpose, and courage; shunning those who tolerate and enable evil], not as the unwise, but as wise [sensible, intelligent, discerning people], making the very most of your time [on earth, recognizing and taking advantage of each opportunity and using it with wisdom and diligence], because the days are [filled with] evil. Therefore, do not be foolish and thoughtless, but understand and firmly grasp what the will of the Lord is” (Ephesians 5:15-17, Amplified Bible).

Couples Mission Statement

8 References

Schultheis, G. M., O'hanlon, A., & O'hanlon, B. (2010). Couples Therapy Homework Planner (Second ed.). Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons, Inc. Worthington, E. L. (2005). Hope-Focused Marriage Counseling: A Guide To Brief Therapy (Expanded pbk ed. ed.). Downers Grove, Illinois, USA: InterVarsity Press....