Essay 3. First Draft PEER revised PDF

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Valeria Wever ENC 1101 Prof. Jason Ehlen Oct 06, 2020 Analysis and Synthesis, First Draft

Stand Up, and Keep Trying

How can the idea of fail in life lead to a successful life? Every person fails in life even the even for people who work so cautiously not to fail. My father always said to me to not see failure like a loss. Instead, see it like an opportunity to reexamine my goal. Sometimes failure shows you were you shouldn’t be and redirect you to the correct place for you. Not everything we dream is what we should have. The failures will put us in the places that correspond to us. The most successful people the world has ever had had a failure to become the most remarkable people they were. Two TEDtalks, “How to life before you die” by Steve Jobs, and “The importance of imagination and fridge benefit of failure” by J.K Rowling prove my claims with their personal experiences.

On a TED talk title “How to live before you die”, Steve Jobs, the founder of Apple, Next, and Pixar. He created three of the most innovative industries in the US, but it was tough and did not see the results of his work quickly. He failed about choosing the right career, and after six months, he dropped. He took calligraphy classes, and it ended up being something that he loved. He claims that "It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way science cannot capture, and I found it fascinating" (4:04). Failing at the career he elected redirect him to went for he

careers that he really adored. Years later, he created the Macintosh computer was the first computer with the most beautiful typography. Then Apple was created by him, but years later, he got fired. It was hard at first, and he got stock for mouths about what was next in his life. He realized that Apple fired him, but in him, there was still talent and passion. After he got fired, he got more time to create new goals, and he made it possible. In his speech, he said, "The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again" (7:21). He created Next and Pixar. Those were his most innovative years. Failure made him achieved the things he did not thought he was capable of.

On the other TED talk, “ “The importance of imagination and fridge benefit of failure”, J.K Rowling, the British writer who wrote the fantasy series called Harry Potter. On her speech she focused on the benefits of failure and the importance of imagination. She always wanted to write novels for a living, but the parents did not share the same decision because they persisted. It would not pay enough. "I was striking an uneasy balance between the ambition I had for myself, and what those closest to me expected of me" (3:42) She faced failure on a massive scale. It was a dark time in her life, but I get the best of her. She put all her attention on what she was good at. It means writing. Failure taught her to get the best out of her . She pressed her to explore what she was good at. She argued "It is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all" The failure is something that we cannot escape from but is something that we can handle with wisdom and intelligence. She explains that "Life is not a check-list of acquisition or achievement" Sometimes, we dreamed of unrealistic things, and we get annoyed when we do not get what we plan.

Both Steve Jobs and J.K Rowling, shared their own personal experiences what made the audience identify with them, and create a bond between the audience. This made the speech more powerful. J.K Rowling declared “ I had failed on an epic scale”. She shared with the audience her dark moment of her life, and that time lasted a long time. She wasn’t homeless, but she was the poorest that could be in Modern Britain. She said that “She began to direct all her energy into finishing the only work that mattered” it means her novel. When we heard the experiences from others, we learn from them. After J.K Rowling said that failure encouraged her to finish her novels, I remembered that long ago I left something that I loved because I had failed, and now I retake it and things are going well. Now I will always remember her speech because her experience encourages me. In the speech of Steve Jobs, I claim "The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again". He shared that he got fired from Apple, and it give him time to rethink about something bigger than that. He created Next, and Pixar those were the most innovative years for him. Their experience had taught me to accept that failure can lead us to better things.

They are both agree about failure led their life to success. Steve Jobs and J.K Rowling there were nothing if they weren’t failing as much as they did. J.K said that “failure gave me an inner security that I had never attained by passing examination” failure show her something that was inside on her, and she didn’t know she have it. “Failure taught things about me that could have learned no other way” Only failure could teach her. Steve Jobs declare that “ If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or

proportionally spaced fonts” He fail about choosing his career, but because he fail he redirected to what was settle for him. Both are agreeing that the failures made them the people they were.

To conclude, failure is the most outstanding professor you would ever have. Steve and J.K Rowling had to fail many times to become the successful people they were. The passion that they both shared was what keep them working. People believe that failing in a new project means that it is not for them, but others get advance from that and perform their work. Live is hard, and it will not always like we dreamed, so don’t be fragile, and keep trying.

Works Cited:

https://www.ted.com/talks/steve_jobs_how_to_live_before_you_die? utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare

https://youtu.be/wHGqp8lz36c

Guiding Questions 1. As a reader, do you feel that you are drawn in by the title and the introduction? 1. Yes I was very intrigued from reading the introduction and it made me wanting to continue reading the essay. 2. From the summary, do you get a clear sense of the main ideas of the two sources?

1. The introductions were a bit difficult to understand as it was mixed with the analyses of the individual text, but I was able to understand the main ideas of the sources as I read on 3. Can you easily identify the thesis of the synthesis? Does the thesis statement have two layers that include both analysis of the sources and the synthesized perspective of your peer’s? 1. “Two TEDtalks, “How to life before you die” by Steve Jobs, and “The importance of imagination and fridge benefit of failure” by J.K Rowling prove my claims with their personal experiences. “ The thesis includes both sources and has the synthesis perspective included in it as well. 4. Is it clear to you how your peer compares and contrasts the two sources? What are the analysis points of your peer’s draft? 1. They clearly point out the differences in the essay and they contrast both sources well enough for mw to understand. 5. Is it clear to you what your peer’s argument is on the topic? Do you agree with that argument? 1. It is clear throughout the synthesis paragraph their argument and they’re own perspective and I do agree with the idea of failure helping someone succeed in life on the long run. 6. Is there any transition from paragraph to paragraph? What are the transitions? 1. There aren’t any transitions from paragraph to paragraph which would mawk the essay flow smoother and easier to read. 7. Does your peer’s organizational structure work to build up the logos of his/her paper? How might your peer revise it? 1. The use of quotes from both sources really does help build the logos and credibility of the paper and so on. 8. Can you easily identify topic sentences in each paragraph? 1. It quite easy understanding the topic of each paragraph after reading it but the topic sentence doesn’t pinpoint the exact topic. 9. Was there a mechanical, grammatical, or spelling error that you noticed as you read the paper? (If so, how could the author fix it? Did you notice this error occurring more than once?) 1. There were quite a few grammatical errors that I pointed out, such as not using the correct tense of the word and misspelling in some cases. As well, I noticed in some parts of the paragraphs that the sentences were to short and very making difficult to understand the point coming across to the reader.

10. What is one strength of this paper that you think you can learn from in your own essay? 1. One strength that I noticed on this paper was the great use of quotes from the sources backing up the authors main points and making it easier to understand....