Persuasive Speech BALA 165 PDF

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Miriam Isakova Professor Arda Nazerian BALA 165 Spring 2016 May 11, 2016

Speech Presentation Project

Full- Text of Speech & Citations: Persuasive Speech: Why You Should Not Use Online Dating *Looking at screen, judging the profiles.* Ummm, no. Oh my god, No. Oh, yes! Gasp! No. Alright, I’m done for the day. Good morning everyone, my name is Miriam, and I’ve actually done exactly that, many times before on various dating apps. With all my experience on apps such as Jswipe, Jdate and Tinder, I know a lot about how the sites work, and how people use them. And I am here to tell you all the reasons you should not try online dating, and to persuade you that it doesn’t work. Now, you’re all young adults living in a highly technological world, and you must often find yourselves wondering how to form genuine connections when most of social interaction has become so… anti -social. You crave genuine relationships, and can’t find a way to create them? Well, that’s when you are probably tempted to create online dating profiles. But before you do, I want to paint the online dating scene for you, and give you a few reasons that you shouldn’t date online. First, some background on online dating… Some of the most used dating apps and sites are: Tinder, Match.com, EHarmony, OkCupid, and Jswipe. They are all pretty much the same in terms of how many users there are and the user demographics of each one. And just to make this even more relatable, the average user’s age is 25 and under. Now, 50 million people use apps like tinder per month, and collectively swipe 1 billion times per day. But even so, ⅓ of people have never gone on a real date with someone they matched with on these sites. A third is a pretty large amount, when you think of all the swiping that’s going on. But let’s also talk about how that swiping works exactly. The way it works is that you go through people’s profiles, swiping either left or right to indicate interest, or lack thereof. Now, the profiles include information like what was on the profiles I demonstrated earlier. People write their name, their age, their hobbies, sometimes their occupation, and they include a photo or two. So you look at these very vague and superficial profiles, and you judge people based just on what’s written there. You then swipe right if you are interested, and left if you are not. And when do you actually start speaking to other people? If you swiped right on someone who swiped right on you too, you start chatting, and maybe even go on a date. But again,

a third of people who get to chat on these sites don’t even end up meeting up in person. Let’s discuss why. First off, let’s call online dating what it actually is, alright? Ready? Say it with me... People shopping. You are swiping as if you are shopping for apples. A human being becomes the equivalent of an apple. You’re going through a pile of them, and you’re like, “no no no, Eh, I guess you’re ok, no, no…” It’s marketplace without the social anxiety, and so it’s very impersonal. People are making decisions on first glance, based solely on your hobbies and age! If you meet someone organically at a bar, or through a mutual friend, you can feel if they’re attracted to you, or interested in you. But you can’t do that online. Online, you can’t tell if they like you because you are rich, or because they like you. Profile doesn’t show amazing parts of your personality that make you who you are. Let’s be honest, people don’t fall in love with your hobbies. And if your hobbies and career aren’t totally ideal to that person, they won’t even consider you. All this rejection based on superficial things then leads to dissatisfaction and eventually, quitting. It’s also super confusing, because people who date online do not all know what they want, and don’t make it clear what they are looking for. Some want serious relationships, others are just looking for flings, and some are just on there to boost their egos when they aren’t feeling pretty. This causes conflict and miscommunication, and its how a lot of people get hurt, thinking that the person they’ve matched with is looking to date, because well, they’re on a dating app, but they find out that the person is interested in something else, whatever that is. So everything about online dating is pretty vague, and that’s also because of the anonymity that let’s people lie. Most people lie. Yes, it is very common for everyone to put his or her best foot forward, but on online dating this concept is very amplified. People are literally convincing you that they are something that they are not. Either their pictures look nothing like them, when you actually see them in person, or it says things like “I love hiking”, or “I love weight lifting”, when really they haven’t been to the gym in 5 months. So anonymity encourages dishonesty and misrepresentation. And what’s worse, is that sometimes people lie so dramatically, and then have the audacity to also go out with the person, knowing that they don’t look like their picture! And obviously, the one thing you’re all thinking about, what if they’re a serial killer? Or a rapist? Or a psycho? Well,1 in 10 sex offenders use online dating to meet people. You never know who you’re talking to on there, and you’re constantly paranoid with this fear. In addition to being paranoid though, you get to talk to people too easily. When you are out in real life, you have to gather up courage to go up to someone and it makes it very exciting, and when you get together its like “wow, if I never came up to you this would never have happened, this is amazing!” But here, you get to talk and go out on a date so easily. It’s not hard and therefore people really don’t appreciate it, they don’t really value

it. They take it for granted, one night you’re going out with one person, next night he goes out with another person. But it doesn’t matter, because you’re people shopping, you’re using people and they’re using you and just that’s the meaningless cycle of online dating. Now we’ve discussed the online dating scene, how it’s a marketplace of people, how miscommunication is inevitable, how anonymity is either dangerous or misleading, and how the ease of it all lets you take it for granted. With these reasons, I hope I’ve persuaded you that online dating does not work. I hope the next time you’re craving a genuine connection, you won’t be tempted to swipe your way to a date, because after all, truly good things don’t come easy!

Sources I Used for Research: 1. Statistic Brain: Online Dating Statistics 2. Mashable: Online Dating is Bigger Than Porn 3. PewResearch: 5 Facts About Online Dating 4. New York Times: Online Dating as Scientific Research 5. Psychology Today: What You Need to Know Before You Try Online Dating

Full- Body Outline of Speech INTRODUCTION: A. Attention Getter: act out a typical swiping behavior that would happen on sites like Tinder: “No, no, yes, no” and so forth. B. Credibility Statement: I have done this before on dating apps. With all my experience on dating apps such as Jswipe, Jdate and Tinder, I know a lot about how the sites work, and how people use them. C. Topic & Purpose (Thesis): I am here to tell you all the reasons you shouldn’t try online dating, and to persuade you that it doesn’t work. D. Relate back to audience: Now, you’re all young adults living in a highly technological world, and you must often find yourselves wondering how to form genuine connections when most of social interaction has become so… anti -social. You crave genuine relationships, and can’t find a way to create them? E. Introduce 3 main points: Well, that’s when you are probably tempted to create online dating profiles. But before you do, I want to paint the online dating scene for you, and give you a few reasons that you shouldn’t date online. First, some background on online dating…

I. Some Background Information

a.

Some of the most used dating apps and sites include: Tinder, Match.com,

EHarmony, OkCupid, and Jswipe. The average user’s age is 25 and under. b.

50 million people use apps like tinder per month, and collectively swipe 1 billion

times per day. But even so, ⅓ of people have never gone on a real date with someone they matched with on these sites.

II. How it Works

a. The way it works is that you go through people’s profiles, swiping either left or right to indicate interest, or lack thereof. b. If matched, you get to start chatting with the person, and maybe even go out on a date. III. Downsides & Why You Should Not Try it a. Online dating is essentially a form of people shopping. It is a marketplace for people, where a human being becomes equivalent to a bag of carrots. b. People who date online do not all know what they want, and don’t make it clear what they are looking for. This causes conflict and miscommunication. c. Anonymity can be dangerous, and it encourages dishonesty and misrepresentation. Most people lie and amplify their best qualities to have a more appealing profile. d. The ease of online dating takes away the value of the dating itself. It’s just too easy, minimal effort is required, if any, therefore people don’t appreciate it and take it for granted. CONCLUSION: A. Summarize 3 main points: Now we’ve discussed the cycle of online dating, and shown how it’s a marketplace of people, anonymity is either dangerous or misleading, miscommunication is inevitable, and the ease lets you take it for granted. B. Restate Thesis: With these reasons, I hope I’ve persuaded you that online dating does not work. I hope the next time you’re craving a genuine connection... C. Tie In With Opening: You won’t be tempted to swipe your way to a date, because after all, truly good things don’t come easy!...